Wednesday, December 23, 2009

12-23- Wednesday

  The humidified stopped up sometime last night and when I awoke this morning, my neck was stiff from the dryness and extremely painful. The first thing I done was head and take 25 mg Morphine. It seemed like forever that it took the stuff to kick in.

  My body looks kind of reptilian from all the scabs formed where my body is healing from the effects of the Taxotere. Little pain that i can tell from it, some of it still burns a bit and some of it itches. At least it's healing. The swelling in my fingers has almost went away, instead of being red, more pinkish now.

  I was eating a Hardees Crispy Chicken and broke a tooth that had decay under the crown. It hasn't broken off completely yet primarily because I haven't eaten anything. I tried an Omelet Denise fixed and while it was soft, the crown still rocks. I'm not sure if it had a root canal or not, I'm guessing not though since I can feel a small portion of discomfort. After I weighed, I'm now down to 197 lbs, so not eating is not an option. I called my dentist office and they are closed until Jan 4th. I talked with mom and she is going to call her dentist tomorrow and see if he is open. The inevitable breaking off made me ask my cousin and brother how they felt when theirs broke off and what they did. While Bill felt no pain when his teeth broke off, Mark was in extreme pain. Mark said that he covered his in sugarless gum until he could get to the dentist to keep air from getting to the exposed nerve. that lead me to search a bit and read and keeping the nerve from air, extreme hot, or extreme cold will cease of at least lessen the pain. Denise went to the store and bought some temporary dental filling for me and that will be my form of sugarless gum. I did notice that my gums are shot. Even the bridges seem loose.

  I tried and can once again drink Coke, still haven't tried Dr Pepper. I just can't forget the horrible taste. I'll bet that is a statement nobody thought they would ever hear me say, lol. I think I'll just go back to Tea. Ensure has a good flavor but the sodium or something in it still burns my throat, plus it thickens my mucus secretions.

  Bowel movement have once again returned, maybe even a bit loose. I don't know what kind of pain medicine is in this patch I wear but even with the Morphine as needed doesn't seem to cause me constipation. Nothing like the Lortab or Endocet did.

  Today was a stressful day. Long unrelated sort in itself. I will say this though. If you are reading this blog and have a loved one going through this or an employee, be as stress-less as possible. Many things that once were important just aren't, especially about work. Not being able to do anything to help or hearing what may seem like important pertaining to office happenings and not being able to do anything about it don't help. Somehow taking a chance to run in and do a task that can be done or should be or could be done by someone else and risking infection, no matter how much money is involved, is just... well, let's leave it at that. 

  I weighed in tonight at 197. I'd say that if I go much lower it will be feeding tube time. Denise says my muscles in my arms and legs are gone and my face looks shrunken in. What I have lost is some fat but mostly muscle. If I can I would like to get back to 200 lbs and hold there until this is over. I am weak outside and I'd say much more stress and I'll be weak inside. Days like today make me doubt what I will make it through it.          
  On the bright side... another good, long, hot, soaking bath. Plus I was able to get two people presents and a camper shell for my truck bought. Thanks to Annie and Bill for their help.