Beautiful day today, a bit cooler, but beautiful. We started out early going to yard sales and later to an auction. I spoke too quickly on the neurapathy though, today has been the worse day in a while. I'm wondering if missing two therapies could have triggered it or perhaps the colder damp temperatures. The day started out very painful and stayed that way all day long even unto the night. Tonight my mouth has stayed a little wetter but all day long it has remained painfully dry. I've had to use the Loratabs all day today and tonight. It feels like it is cracking open. I long for the day that I will not need anything again.
Today's stool had a lot of blood in it but it was dark blood. Maybe I should mention it but I will not. The last thing I need is to be poked and prodded even more.
Tomorrow, God willing, I will plant the green beans. I'm not sure just how long or what effect the teeth extraction will be and have. Only one tooth is above the gum line now. It is so strange, with all I have endured so far in my life this bothers and scares me. At times throat cancer is Hell on earth, a living nightmare. So why should this be such a bother? I've had at most two teeth extracted at the same time and it didn't slow me down a bit yet... I'm already slower. Plus the teeth are located to where I will not have a side or position to chew on. I am certain that I will lose some weight.
I know that I will miss Tuesday's treatment and it worries me that I may have to miss a few more. I do believe that these treatments work. Who would have thought that just getting pressurized and breathing oxygen would do that. It must be a nightmare for Big Pharma. I can actually see my goosel now.
I'll feel better about things when the garden is planted then I will once again be worried that I will not be able to keep them up, already I'm behind.
Tomorrow is Mother's Day and I have already handed out my Mother's Day cards and gifts. For Denise, she has a new kid to care for... me. I thank God that He gave her to me and gave me to her. On the 17th she will turn 42, and already she has led a hard life, yet she doesn't complain. The last 10 years it seems that I have had to often stop and count my blessings just to keep my sanity and my very will to live. She is one of those blessings... a big one. The fact that she is beautiful even amazes me more for she doesn't have to settle. Yet she does.
